Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Like petals flying by

Time, that is.

We're nearly up to a week since our Boy Wonder left on his summer hiatus and we miss the boy like crazy. But he's having a blast, getting a tan, and drinking more salt water than he can handle at the moment and that's just what the kid should be doing.

Tomorrow (or today, I can't remember) I hit 37 weeks. Did ya get that? Full-freakin'-term. That's a bit intimidating. Exhilarating. And frightening, all at the same time. Whoa...

I was sprawled out on the couch a few moments ago as only a near-walrus-sized human can do so prettily and the thought occurred to me...what if this is the last one? Is that a normal thought/panic moment? It's very likely. We're about topped out on resources and energy and the chance is high that our brood will remain at three once M.E. arrives...and that made me sad all of a sudden.

I spent so much of this pregnancy pressing on and hurrying after kids that I didn't spend a whole lot of time relishing. Sure, I made jokes about squished bladders and gi-normous space boobs, but now that it's coming to a close sooner or later, I wonder if I took enough time to really enjoy the off-balance, mood-altering sense of wonder that accompanies this journey? And let's be honest...did I really spend enough time admiring my adult acne-free skin?! (to the mirror!)

I can't answer those big questions and most nights I don't try...but it seems like tonight the thought sailed through my mind quietly like a ship heading somewhere...

One thing that reminds me that I'm sorta okay with being done with this go-round is today's three hour glucose test. HELLO! Talk about chugging dirty Popsicle water the consistency of cough syrup! I had braced myself the best I could for the fallout of no food for 12 hours AND the syrup of hell but I was simply not prepared for how close to death the sh^% made me feel. Every five minutes I found myself moving seats in the waiting room one closer to the bathroom on the other side of the room. I walked outside. I prayed for a little relief. I wondered if this was how hot flashes felt and oh, dearlordy, how am I going to deal with those in a couple decades! AUGH!

I made it through the four pokes somehow without barfing OR biting the phlebotomist and spent the rest of the day unable to form coherent sentences or process logical thoughts. Oh, and with indigestion from the awful Mexican food I felt compelled to woof down an hour after being released from my glucose prison. Not fun. Not fun at all...

So as we scramble for any last minute necessities and my ridiculous need to wear more makeup now than I ever have in my life (true story...it's odd), we wait. And watch the petals of time drift by, on a breeze or on gale-force winds as they seem to sometimes.

Soon a baby will be here. Soon Boo will be in a big man bed. Soon Boy Wonder will be in second grade. Soon P will be done with school. Soon our lives will shift and drift and grow.

And soon it will be bedtime... and right now, that's just fine with me.

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